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<< The Novel of Purpose, By Way of Introduction | Front Page | The Novel of Purpose: Guest Post by Paul Giles >>
Friday, April 13, 2007
Geography is Tough!
Posted by John Holbo on 04/13/07 at 08:24 PM
I’m not participating in our book event, but I thought maybe this would be relevant to Scott’s lament that excessive focus on geographic niceties can lead to absurdity, or at least dovetail with it in herculean fashion. From the Greatest American Novel, The Eye of Argon, by Jim Theis:
“What are you called by female?”
“Carthena, daughter of Minkardos, Duke of Barwego, whose lands border along the northwestern fringes of Gorzom. I was paid as homage to Agaphim upon his thirty-eighth year,” husked the femme!
“And I am called a barbarian!” Grunted Grignr in a disgusted tone!
“Aye! The ways of our civilization are in many ways warped and distorted, but what is your calling,” she queried, bustily?
“Grignr of Ecordia.”
“Ah, I have heard vaguely of Ecordia. It is the hill country to the far east of the Noregolean Empire. I have also heard Agaphim curse your land more than once when his troops were routed in the unaccustomed mountains and gorges.” Sayeth she.
“Aye. My people are not tarnished by petty luxuries and baubles. They remain fierce and unconquerable in their native climes.” After reaching the hidden panel at the head of the stairway, Grignr was at a loss in regard to its operation. His fiercest heaves were as pebbles against burnished armour! Carthena depressed a small symbol included within the elaborate design upon the panel whereopen it slowly slid into a cleft in the wall. “How did you come to be the victim of those crazed shamen?” Quested Grignr as he escorted Carthena through the piles of rummage on the left side of the trap.
hat tip: ISB
Ugh, you’re going to give this former copy editor a heart attack.
How does one query “bustily”? ... The mind boggles.
Even worse, I had somehow recalled the passage as ‘husking bustily’ - even worse, you see. Suggests a truly terrifying method for removing the green stuff from fresh corn.
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